So many things are going through my head, on so many different topics, and I feel so unsure about everything going on right now. AHHHHHHHHHHHH okay. I feel a little better :)
It all boils down to I need to be in The Word, spend some close personal time with GOD, and Listen to what he has for me. I know this. I know the anxiety that is keeping me awake at night will be pacified, and life will resume normalcy. So if I know this... why can't I do it?

things I need to get done:
Letters for Honduras Mission Trip: if anyone wants to sponsor me please let me know.
Resume Touch Ups
DAILY devotionals
Study for the MCAT
Lessons for Small Group
Quality time with my sweet Pixie!

Things I am needing direction for:
Jobs- stay or apply (go)
if stay: finding a house for next year
Mood
Finishing the school year strong!

I love the Mexican's i'm surrounded by :)

OKay so If you know me, you most definitely know that I have absolutely no cooking ability what-so-ever. I mean my house now does not even have an oven or stove... seriously! So apparently, this astounds the mexican's I am surrounded by here on the Tx coast. (it's okay to refer to them like that I promise) So last night while working a softball game my head softball coaches wife, one of my student athletic trainers, and a JV softball player were not only teaching me spanish, they were explaining how to cook some authentic mexican dishes. I mean homemade tortillas seriously... I didn't think that was possible... I thought they came in a little ziploc bag and you add ingredience for taco's... and that was as homemade as it got. I was wrong! So to the amusement of the faculty I work with and most of the students... I am learning. I am even going to get cooking lessons wow! I know! Seriously!!!

Spanish words I learned last night: masa prounced Ma-saw tortilla dough
palota-rolling pin prounced pa loe ta
palotae-ball prounced pa loe tay

YaY! for me!

Master Locks

Have you ever been so frustrated with a master lock and it's key because it just would not work? Well I live my life using masterlocks and can I just say how frustrating! I know I have the right key and it will just not budge in the lock. I try wiggling, shaking, screaming, yelling, slamming the lock etc. and then once I am calm again, I try again pulling the key out just a little or wiggling it gently and TADAA open sesame. This exact thing happened while trying to set up the baby room for my sister. I had to call a friend of her's and her husband to come help me move out their guest furniture to their storage unit. We got the keys and set off. We get to the office and the gate is locked and we at this point are praying we have the key to open. Friend tries both keys on key ring and all three gates and nope couldn't get it. I asked to try and got it open fairly quickly.. Lots of practice I tell ya !
All this to say, how many times in our life do we try and fight to make something work we know works and yet it just isn't. With Careers, or finding one, studying in college, handling sticky situations with family, friends, remote controls, cell phones, pens oh goodness all the scribbling. But when we take a step back and let God lead the situation, He gets it on the first try. He just sits back, waits for us to give up and allow him to take over. We may know how to talk to friends, how to study, how to make a pen write, but without guidance, without peace we just can't get it. God has a plan, and sometimes doors are slammed just to teach us to rely on Him.

As for me I look to the Lord for help. I wait confidently for God to save me, and my God will certainly hear me. Micah 7:7

meet Shelby!

Okay, so I have the most adorable niece, our little lucky charm!

She was born March 17th... After a few complications, a close call, and many many hours in the hospital she arrived cute, bright blue eyes, and all. Love her! Lots of stress was involved with the last week as my sister had nothing in her house for this new addition, but she was totally worth every bit of it! YaY!!!

my extended spring break

So I have been pretty quiet of late.. unintentionally, but between work and my new neice the last few weeks have been quite packed. This blog is just a teaser... but actual posts will commence this comming week... a few topics are already being thought about My new neice Shelby being a main topic i'm sure. Some other points of interest are me coaching, friends, my crazy family, and my newest endeavor of the master cleanse... yeah yeah I know. should be interesting... Hope you are all doing well!

to sure of yourself????

OK so funny little comment made me think yesterday, but due to Taks testing I wasn't able to post until today. While of potty patrol with a co-worker a parent of said co workers former student came up. While discussing the child who kudos was just accepted to Julliard, a comment was made. Mom thought a girl was involved with student moving to Manhattan (already going to school in NY). Mom does not like girl for no other reason than

"she is just to sure of herself, Gives me the creeps"

Seriously is there a problem with being confident? The mom believes the girl came from a family of wealth (being I live in a poor rural area wealth is relative) and with said wealth came more opportunities, more experiences, all leading to more confidence. Why is having the belief that you can accomplish anything if you work hard and are dedicated to the task a horrible thing? Why would you not want your son to be involved with someone who has determination? Does God not tell us " you can do all things through me" ? I am just appalled with the mentality here, but am beginning to understand the lack of drive in the students here as well as the lack of ambition once they graduate. Destined to plant life forever?????

finding the shade

With the end of the year quickly approaching, (its almost spring break!) thoughts of transition begin to enter my mind. For me, thoughts of whether to stay or look for a different position are on the fore front of my mind. This year has definitely been tough. It was a struggle internally from the beginning, prior to even accepting the job, but in the end God wanted me here and here I ended. To say I was pleased about this would be a complete and udder lie. In short I was miserable, to the point I was excited about the prospect of a hurricane! Christmas came, and I got to get out for a while and I think it was the best thing for me. I came back with a renewed faith in God and a belief that HE has me here for a reason. I can tell you I have learned more being here than I want to admit, and I am being prepared for the future more and more with each day. So thoughts of leaving are still on my mind, but that would be what I want for my life, but is it what God wants? A question I have been pondering for weeks. I pray and pray for direction, and for God to use my life to increase His kingdom no matter what! Well have I been open to listening? Sunday's sermon was about Prayer, and the steps of Prayer, transitioning from asking, to pleading, to listening and I am learning what that actually means. For further assistance and reaffirmation that I am trying to live for God I went back to my favorite book in the Bible last night. Jonah. From childhood, I have had a fascination with him living inside a whale's belly because God loved him and had a plan for him besides drowning in his disobedience. When he was spit out, and finally did what God asked, he was still unhappy about it, and still had disobedience. I think this has been me, while I have learned a great deal, I have not been completely receptive to God's plan. I still had my thoughts and feelings leading my day to day thoughts and actions with God sort of being my overall guide. Well I am here to tell you that does not work! Thanks Jonah for teaching me more and showing me that my everything needs to be about God or I'll loose my shade as well.