The end of the school year has in my life always been a time of rejoice, a time of joy, and a sign of relaxation to come. This year while I am thankful for a break from the monotony of work soon, I find myself feeling very discontent with life and my situation. I feel very much as if I have don't nothing special, spectacular, or moving in short I've wasted a year. The summer is a time of joy and celebration as many friends enter into marriage, parenthood, and new beginnings. I am overjoyed to share in these times with my friends, however I can't help but feel unattached, discontent, and lonely with my own life. As a single girl in my mid 20's I am reaching a point where I wonder if this is where I will be for the rest of my life. Will I stay single, is my current job where i am destined to be until I retire, is this the life i have arranged for myself?
1 Corinthians 7 tells us:
34An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
I know from this that singleness is a blessing, a season in life that I am totally available to God with nothing else in my life more important. I have given my life to God and desire to do His will, yet I am not feeling direction to do anything different with my life from what I am except for the discontent in my own heart. I can't help but think this discontent comes from God, and yet I am not feeling direction towards anything else. Is this just a season as another year winds down where I question my worth and actions, or am I missing the point of my life? Am I doing what God wants, or am I allowing my head decide completely ignoring my heart thus blocking God. I am beginning to hate the change of seasons!
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